I felt God today

I walked the kiddos up to the end of the driveway this morning and it was such a beautiful sunrise. The air was cool and crisp. I just breathed in the smell of spring all around me. So pretty. I knew that something special would happen today.

I planned to meet a friend and buy a couple of dresses from her. I felt it would be a great day for a walk. I grabbed my mp3 player, put on some comfortable clothes, pulled my hair back, and headed into town. I met my friend and got the dresses then took off to the park. I pulled into the parking lot and there wasn't a car around. Yay! I get the walking trail all to myself. I picked up my mp3 player and put it on shuffle. I knew I had all types of music on there, worship, contemporary, dance. I just wanted something to keep my step to. Little did I know what God had in store through the little mp3 player.

First song was country. "Don't Blink" by Kenny Chesney. Great reflection song. I thought about how fast time has gone by and how my kids were growing up way too fast. Next was "The Way you Love Me" by Faith Hill. Cute, Sweet, reminded me how much I love my family. Next was "Amazing Grace" by Chris Tomlin. Thought of my friend who passed away last week. Next was "Water Rises" by Corinne Chapman. Thought about the struggles I have had recently. How I seem to get through them but then more come up. Just never ending. Then it happened. I had two worship songs (I cannot remember the names but they were powerful). God was speaking to me through these songs. He was reminding me that He is here with me. I am not alone. I have felt so alone lately. Then "Healing Rain" by Michael W. Smith came on. I was in tears. I was really glad no one else was on this trail because I was in full blown cry mode. I realized I was angry. Angry about so many things. I listened to the words of that song. I hit my heart so hard. Before I knew it my hands were lifted and I was worshipping. I was healing. I gave in. Next thing I felt was arms holding me. He was right there with me! On the trail! He was giving me a huge bear hug. I have never felt that feeling before. Not like that. It was so amazing.

I had only planned to walk a mile (2 figure 8s around the park) but I just couldn't stop. I wanted to hear more. Next song was "Who you'd be Today" by Kenny Chesney. I thought again about my friend. I have been so angry about his death. It didn't seem fair that he was gone. It was not making sense to me. When that song came on I had let the anger go. I was accepting his death. I could actually smile about the fact he is in Heaven and I will see him again someday. The next song was "Live Like We're Dying" by Kris Allen. I thought about how each day needs to matter. Live each day to the fullest. You just never know. Then to finish off my now 2 mile walk I had another wonderful worship song. I felt so full. I felt so free. I felt God today in the park. I had been asking Him where He was and He answered me. I just can't even describe how it felt. It is all mine.

Now I know that I am going to continue to fight the evils and cancers and bad things that the enemy keeps throwing my way. The enemy continuously keeps breaking down anything good. When I start feeling bogged down by the pains of this earth I am going to go back to the park and the huge bear hug I got from God. I felt so safe. I will hold on to that feeling for the rest of my life. Looking forward to my next walk in the park!